Day 54: Wisteria

After I removed all the wrapper from this crayon, I placed it on its side and started swinging it around to make the circular shapes.  It takes quite a bit of muscle to press the crayon length-wise to make it dark enough.

Once I completed the drawing, I realized that a "wisteria" IS a flower.  I had looked at the name, but I was not consciously thinking that I should draw a flower (like on "Granny Smith Apple" day, where I specifically wanted to draw an apple).

I do an Art Therapy technique titled the "The Rosebush", where I direct my clients to visualize a rosebush.  I ask, Where does it lives? Who takes care of it? Does it have thorns? ... and many other questions.  This becomes a metaphor for the self - as all art ultimately is.  So, what does this rose drawing say about me?

It does have thorns.  I can be a little prickly at times, but most people do not know that about me unless they get close enough to see those thorns.  The rose is strongly rooted into the ground.  I feel that I am pretty stable and rooted.  We only see half the flower, though.  Am I trying to hide something?  I don't really think so.  What else could it be?  There is a lot more to my life that I have yet to see - the whole picture had yet to be revealed.  I guess we never get to see the whole picture until the very end.  And we may or may not be totally cognizant at that age/time to understand.

Day 43: Timberwolf

I felt like drawing cartoons today.  Not sure why, and I knew immediately that I wanted to draw cartoon animals.  I had to look up cartoon animals, and copy them. That's the thing again, I can copy anything, I just need help getting started, and than I always end up making it my own.  I am like that with anything, even writing a reference letter or cooking a meal.  i just need a little motivation to get going.

These animals are playful and fun.  I did not even look at the color name until I started peeling the wrapper off to melt the crayon to make the darker color.  I am amused that this color is "Timberwolf". According to Crayola, this color was not introduced until 1993.   It looks like gray to me.

Day 41: Asapagus

Here's the funny thing...
I drew the entire picture BEFORE I even looked at the crayon name, and it looks like an asparagus plant. Crazy, right?!  I think it was just the color that inspired the plants.  It was also the design on the tissue box in front of me  - you never know where inspiration comes from.  I really like to have something to look at, as opposed to making up ideas out of my head. I don't like admitting that out loud.  My critical voice in me says that creativity has to come from inside, but my supportive voice says that creativity can find inspiration anywhere.  So there, stupid critical voice.

Having a bad day - fight with the hubby - just not connecting or seeing eye to eye on a lot of things.  Than daughter suggested that we go out for a run together.  Amazingly, I feel better, and I am almost ready to make-up with hubby.

I find that the daily drawing does the same thing for me that exercise does - I don't necessarily feel motivated to do it, but if I force myself, I always feel better after.

PS: Daughter just asked if I married "Dad" because he is "inferior".  I sarcastically told her absolutely.  She says she is kidding but she like nerdy, wimpy guys.  Hubby may present to others as wimpy, but he is very hard-headed and opinionated.  Daughter is funny. (I did not even mention to her that hubby and I had an argument).

Day 39: Plum

Today I felt inspired to draw a figure.  I thought to myself "What is the most archetypal figure drawing of all time?".  The only answer to that is daVinci's Vitruvian Man (the figure drawing in a circle)  a world-renowned drawing created by Leonardo da Vinci around the year 1487. It is accompanied by notes based on the work of the famed architect, Vitruvius. The drawing, which is in pen and ink on paper, depicts a male figure in two superimposed positions with his arms and legs apart and simultaneously inscribed in a circle and square. The drawing and text are sometimes called the Canon of Proportions. 


I blindly grabbed a redish crayon from the box, but I realized that I used a hot color yesterday (Salmon), and I really wanted a cool color.  I picked out "Plum", which is directly in the middle of hot and cool. I ask myself, "What am I directly in the middle of right now?"  I started drawing the daVinci figure, but it came out as a female figure as opposed to the very male figure of daVinci's Vitruvian Man.  I now notice that the figure does not quite fit into the box, as the man does, and she is at an angle leaning to the right.  Maybe I feel that a woman can not be put so easily in a vertical box.  Or, maybe I am just on quite straight (take that as you wish - it has multiple insinuations. As Dan Savage says, "Female sexuality is much more fluid".).


I really had a great time drawing this.  I needed that tonight because my girls were in typical adolescent form - tired, cranky and irritable. I was very pleased that I was able to defuse them and the hubby, and end the evening on a positive note.  I drew this as I was also watching Dr. Drew Pinsky's "Celebrity Rehab".  Again, I know that Art Therapy would be an amazing contribution to his rehab program.  The art is so raw and honest it breaks through the walls of isolation and denial.  

Day 38: Salmon

I did this at work, while waiting for a new client.  I was copying the rug in my office.  Don't like the rug so much - don't really dislike it either, but it's not my favorite.  (My officemate bought it). I do spend a great deal of time looking at the intricate patterns on this rug.  I do like the way the lines and shapes intertwine.  I could not really get the detail with a crayon.  Frustrated.

My oldest daughter is turning 16 on Saturday.  I've been thinking about this a lot.  She has become such a wonderful woman (I'm sure every mother says that).  How is she the same tiny baby I held in the white rocking chair?...Sunrise, Sunset....  Our lives are intertwined like this pattern, and its imprecise and nowhere near as clean or detailed as I'd like it. Frustrated.

My younger daughter asked me yesterday how I would describe her with one word, and Cydney would definitely be "Intense". She feels everything very intensely - love, frustration, anger and humor.  Than she asked what one word I would use to describe myself.  That's hard.  I came up with "Clarity".  I like things to be clear and obvious, neat and clean.  Maybe that is why I am frustrated a lot.  I'm working on it.  My husband would probably say that I am anything BUT clear.  he would more likely describe me as vague and indecisive.  

Day 37: Green Yellow

The other night as I was laying in bed (couldn't sleep) I realized that I can draw with one crayon on multiple surfaces!  It seems so simple, but it was a revelation to me.  That opens up all types of possibilities...

For this drawing I have taken three different colors of construction paper, and ripped and layered them prior to drawing.  The "Green Yellow" color looks so distinctively altered from one colored paper to another.

I was really tired when I realized that I had not drawn yet. I thought about putting it off and doing two tomorrow.  But I was also excited about doing the multiple layered colored paper, so I decided to rally some energy and just do it.  For me, making art is just like exercise... Sometimes I really do NOT feel up to doing it, but I ALWAYS feel better after.  Even if I am not pleased with the final result.  This project became more about the process, because what came out is sort of boring.  I liked the ripping and the gluing, and even drawing on the softer paper that was slightly wet from the glue was pleasant.  It was dark in the room, so I could not see the colors well, so what I see now, in the light, is a little more exciting than I thought at first.

This final product seems a little elementary - simple and child-like.  Maybe because the materials are so kindergarten (construction paper and crayons), I had a regression to a more simple me.

Day 35: Purple Mountains' Majesty

I've been avoiding this color, because it looks grayish purple, and seemed kind of ugly.  I purposely pulled it out today, because I am feeling yucky and blah - with a runny nose and a stuffy head.  Than I looked at the color name "Purple Mountains' Majesty" and that struck me as a silly, almost ridiculous, name.  BUT once I started drawing with it, I really like the color.  It is much more purple than I thought.

I wanted the mountains to be a part of the drawing, because of the name, so I started copying one of my old paintings that I have hanging in my dining room (where I am sitting to draw).  I forgot how much I really like this painting.  I did this painting right after my second daughter was born (WOW, it does not seem like 13 years ago that I made that painting).  I like that I was able to get several textures from the crayon in this drawing - by using shading combined with patterns.

I actually feel a little better after completing this drawing.  A little more energized and focused.  Maybe I can actually get something done today.

Day 34: Olive Green

I'm feeling better today - not 100%, but better.  My nose is still runny, but I am not as tired.  Getting things done today.

I wear a lot of Olive Green, so it's kind of funny that I drew a girl not wearing anything but underpants.  Again, I really wish I could draw better with crayons, but they are very limiting.  When I try to draw dark, the wax just clumps up and even sometimes gets lighter.  I am more than half way through this project.  It's going sa lot faster than I thought.  What will I do after?  Wait and see...

This is inspired by a Victoria's Secret ad that came in the mail today.  I love the clothes from VS.  However, I must say... I am not feeling too sexy these days.

Day 32: Apricot

I have to say that I am getting really tired of drawing with crayons.  They are pretty limiting.  I am trying to be creative, but it is hard.  I just want to draw with ink or paint or anything else... This is what it's like to be on a truly restrictive diet.  After 32 days, I just want to eat different food!

This started out as a tree and turned into an octopus looking "thang". The lighter crayons are really waxy, and harder to get a color variation.  I had so much fun melting the green crayon yesterday, that I got out the lighter again, and just let it go wild.  I even brunt the paper in a few places (I don't think you can see that in the scan).  I am pretty sure that the melted wax is going to start chipping off, so this will be an image that continues to change and morph.

As I look at it now, I feel like I want it to be something that it is not.  Or maybe I want the crayons to do something that they are not made to do.  What does that say about me?  I start off with one intention and get sidetracked into something else?  I want to present as cool, hip and unique, but really I am messy and sloppy.  Plus, nothing is going to stay the same forever.  I believe these last few drawings have really been speaking to my own feelings of getting older and not being able to pull off "young" anymore.

Also, this past week I have been trying to put together a Women's Art Group, and I am getting frustrated.  I believe people are interested, but everyone is so busy and/or commitment phobic that they will not settle on a date to meet.  I just want to create an opportunity to be social, creative and interactive with some really special women. (and maybe use it as an excuse to have a glass of wine on a week day evening).  Just like with the crayons, I am frustrated.

Day 31: Green

This was a lot of fun to make!  First I removed the entire wrapper and cut it into strips. I broke a very small portion of the tip off so I would have something to draw with, than I took out my big fireplace lighter and melted the rest of the crayon.  When it got too small to hold and melt, I stuck a toothpick in the end and melted the rest.

This is what developed from collaging the wrapper and drawing around the drips.  My daughter says it look like amoebas.  I agree that there is some feeling of growth and movement - metamorphosis even.   I feels freer and less controlled from the previous few drawings - I like that.  I needed that.